“The soul is incapable of truly acquiring control of the passions and restriction of the inordinate appetites without forgetting and withdrawing from the sources of these emotions. Disturbances never arise in a soul; unless through the apprehensions of the memory. When all things are forgotten, nothing disturbs the peace or stirs the appetites. As the saying goes: What the eye doesn’t see, the heart doesn’t want.” ~ St. John of the Cross
What I remember of my childhood is often indeterminate or vague: the taste of my favorite angel food cake, getting thrown from horse during summer vacation at Lake Tahoe, or the scratchy feeling from the burlap robes I wore while a shepherd in the Christmas play; also in my brain- are the memories of my first glimpse at a porn magazine; other things I have completely forgotten, but that memory is still alive – faded and diminished, but still there. As I got older, those images of perversion got more explicit and intense, layer upon layer of naked photos, moving pictures on the television screen, and shadowed glimpses of female strippers. Why do they survive?
Porn is so incredibly invasive because it feeds into all of the mainline systems of the body: the physical, the psychological, and the spiritual. When the male sees porn, there is an immediate hormonal response – quickening of the heart rate, coursing of the blood through the body, elevating the endorphins; the psyche feels satisfaction from the release of pent-up desires and tensions; and the soul receives a false reward of gratification that mirrors the ecstasy of heavenly bliss. Forgetting and replacing these images can be challenging. Yet, in order to be free from the obsession with porn – it must be done. First of all, those sensations must be replaced with genuine and healthy realities. This can be thoroughly accomplished by dedicating oneself to Our Lord Jesus Christ: offering all our past weaknesses, aberrations, and sins to Him. Asking for His healing. This comes about by embracing a dedicated prayer life, the daily practice of meditation, and by partaking in the Sacraments. Then, over the old icons of despair and death, you will be building a new fortress that more resembles the destiny the Lord intended for us: to be true children of God – sacred in our design and in our thoughts. Later, those old emotions of lust will dissipate. But, we must remain strong resolute, and Trust-filled in Christ.