The community I belonged to, when I was briefly in the religious life, followed “The Rule of St. Benedict.” Written in the 5th and 6thCenturies, by St. Benedict of Nursia, an Italian monk who is considered the Father of Christian Monasticism, is the definitive document for all religious orders that were to follow. “The Rule” is a set of precepts which served as a foundation for the organization of a religious community, and the form and structure of a monk’s spiritual life and temporal existence.
When I read “The Rule,” and lived it, I loved every word. Beforehand, I had moved around the world according to my own whims. About the only guidelines I noticed were the various times of my University classes, the schedule of events at The Castro Theater, and when the various clubs closed. At first glance, I saw it as very restrictive, but as I came to understand – I realized how practical “The Rule” actually was. I found it completely livable, rather charitable and forgiving, and life-affirming while taking into account the many failures and weaknesses of Man.
In my recent work with those suffering from porn addiction and other sexual vices, I find this section of Benedict’s “Rule” very enlightening:
CHAPTER XXII
How the Monks Are to Sleep
Let the brethren sleep singly, each in a separate bed. Let them receive the bedding befitting their mode of life, according to the direction of their Abbot. If it can be done, let all sleep in one apartment; but if the number doth not allow it, let them sleep in tens or twenties with the seniors who have charge of them. Let a light be kept burning constantly in the cell till morning.
Let them sleep clothed and girded with cinctures or cords, that they may be always ready; but let them not have knives at their sides whilst they sleep, lest perchance the sleeping be wounded in their dreams; and the sign having been given, rising without delay, let them hasten to outstrip each other to the Work of God, yet with all gravity and decorum. Let the younger brethren not have their beds beside each other, but intermingled with the older ones; and rising to the Work of God, let them gently encourage one another on account of the excuses of the drowsy.
Here, we see how “The Rule” understands rather subtle nuances of sexuality that hitherto would not be examined until the modern era: masturbation, homosexuality, and something likened to contemporary accountability partners. First of all, the inclusion of a burning light in the monk’s dormitory is fascinating. Looking back, I remember how every disco, gay-bar, and sex-club was enshrouded in a constant literal darkness. The scant light seemed to limit the inhibitions; create a public space in which deviance could be semi-privately explored while still maintaining the thrill exhibitionism. These experiences were so different from my very early time spent back with the Catholic Church, in which the light always attracted me: the stream of sunshine coming through Church windows, the radiance of the sacred vessels used for Mass, and the flickering of candles. Secondly, the monk’s custom of sleeping while girded with cinctures or cords is reminiscent of Saint Paul’s letter to the Ephesians: “Stand therefore, having your loins girt about with truth…” Of course, the extreme discomfort of sleeping with cords about the waist is acceptable for ascetics, but the everyday layperson should always make a habit of going to bed with a crucifix around their neck, the scapular, or the miraculous medal. Lastly, and perhaps most importantly, Benedict has very specific rules for the arrangement of the monks in the dormitory. This creates a sort of checks and balances system, in which the older and spiritually more mature monks watch over the younger brothers who may be susceptible to increased sexual temptation from the devil. But, sadly, in today’s world, men are extremely reticent to discuss any type of sexual sin or dysfunction with male family members or friends. Only, this is exactly what Benedict calls for: a communal safeguard in which we never allow a fellow Christian to suffer alone from sexual sins. For, someday, when Our Lord asks us how we loved our brother, we do not want to give the same snide remark as Cain: “…am I my brother's keeper?”