In recorded interviews with George Stephanopoulos on the ABC News program “This Week” and Bob Schieffer on “Face the Nation” on CBS, Cardinal Dolan, the archbishop of New York said: “...we’ve got to do better to see that our defense of marriage is not reduced to an attack on gay people. And I admit, we haven’t been too good at that. We try our darnedest to make sure we’re not an anti-anybody.” Speaking just days after the Supreme Court heard arguments in two same-sex marriage cases, Stephanopoulos asked Dolan what he could say to gay men and lesbians who felt excluded from the church. Dolan Said: “Well, the first thing I’d say to them is: ‘I love you, too. And God loves you. And you are made in God’s image and likeness. And — and we — we want your happiness. But — and you’re entitled to friendship. But we also know that God has told us that the way to happiness, that — especially when it comes to sexual love — that is intended only for a man and woman in marriage, where children can come about naturally.” On “Face the Nation, he said much the same thing when Mr. Schieffer questioned him about whether the church would embrace more liberal teachings as public opinion shifts. Dolan answered: “How to remain faithful to what we believe are God-given, revealed, settled, unchanging principles without losing our people, who more and more question them. I think what we can’t tamper with what God has revealed,” he added. But, he said, “we can try to do better in the way we present them with more credibility and in a more compelling way.”
Thank you Cardinal Dolan. This needed to be said for a very long time. When I speak with gay men, and I say that I am Catholic, the groans are always audible. And here, the Cardinal has gotten it right, for I do not water my message down, but try to present the Truth with Love. As Catholics, have we done that? Well, the current state of so-called men's spirituality in the Catholic sphere is rather dominated by what I will call the “Crossing the Goal” phenomena; named after the EWTN program. As I see it, Catholic men's groups often overly emphasize a routine form of masculinity: the married life, and fatherhood. While all these things are very good, they also alienate the gay population. I think it sets up a wall. If you are not a married man (married to a woman;) or at the very least heterosexual; we have nothing to share with you here; Stay out! Regardless, we have been blessed by the work of the late Fr. John Harvey, a man who should be a Saint one day; I will argue in a later blog that that apostolate has been pushed to the side, like an ultra-orthodox embarrassment, or shunned altogether. Many times, when gay men approach me, after a talk, or in an e-mail, I feel as if I have very little to offer. I am often fearful to refer them to their local priest, as I repeatedly hear horror stories from homosexuals about misguided pastors who send these men right back out into the jungle; they often tell the penitents: “...its OK as long as you try to be monogamous.” Here, is where the Catholic laity must step up. Now, Cardinal Dolan is doing his part, but the Catholic faithful must also welcome our gay brothers and sisters with an inclusivity, that does not mean a capitulation, but with a Love that Jesus poured out to all.