“Catholic” author Eve Tushnet continues to miss the mark every time she writes and speaks; this latest interview with “Religion News Service” is no exception: “…identifying as a lesbian is a succinct way to honor my experiences in gay communities. In these places, I learned a lot, confronted my own privileges, and met some amazing people. I don’t want to reject those people or experiences.” First of all, I have a big problem with lesbians being spokespeople for the larger homosexual community – which is mostly made up of gay men; for, in fact, gay men have more in common with heterosexual men than they do with lesbians – who have been unfortunately clumped together with gay males in the awkward initialism LGBT. This uncommonality is clearly evident in the over-sentimentality of Tushent who clearly finds much nostalgia in her former gay life. This phenomena hits to the heart of the difference between gay men and women – where testosterone agitates, estrogen languishes. I found this out rather quickly in San Francisco, albeit from a disinterested distance while observing some of the lesbians who would crash our pre-Pride parties in June of ever year. While the gay men were busy hooking-up and darting into the restrooms and alleyways for a quickie, the women endlessly gabbed and held hands in tight little circles of secluded lethargy. The men were restless and frenzied, the music and boundless posing revealed a masculinity gone berserk. On the other end of the psychological spectrum – lesbians were turned inward; whereas gay men reject the female, lesbians collapse back into it: constantly seeking out the mother. In that, you see the sort of dreamy domestic bliss and scrap-book collecting mentality of a Tushnet, who rejects the sex, but holds onto the wispy and prettified gay ideal. Only, in lesbianism, this is more plausible than in gay homosexuality, as gay women have the lowest rates of HIV infection in any sexually active group; as a community, they have been rather untouched by the horror of AIDS. For the rest of us, the men who survive homosexuality – there is little to look back upon with melancholy. Instead, the past only reveals the deceived and the dead. And, unlike Tushnet, I believe the “gay” moniker pays homage to no one; for, they all died in vain.
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